Strict Bad English

The terrible Christmas venom called Kim is not dead and buried after all. He have now dusted off his jacket and updated his diary. I bought him a Supergold membership and that made him come back to Diaryland. That gay sucker. You must go read him and write in his fresh new comments. Kim craves acceptance and dominance constantly. He's a dark pit in the grey everyday, the little devil that trouble me with innocent evil. The one my non-existent God demands me to forgive. -"Play along -God say, play along, there are worse things than this..." but I'm the Idealist with love definitions and there are really no forgiveness for someone like me. I tear things apart for my own amusement. I am the supporter of everyone, but I'm not on anyones side. It's not your choice to dislike or like me. Behind my truly good intentions there, I use my intellect like a sharp weapon. I want to bury it, yet I want you to cherish it. There is no forgivess for the ignorant, I have my dark sides too. The little devils are not such hard nuts to crack. I want to drag them with me, underground. I'll show them the sour apples of life. I'll make them see what I see.

If you dont understand what you just read, dont mind, it's not important for you either then. I dont just write to one type of people here. Things happen in my head and I cant explain everything, for everyone.

I love my readers...

I have changed my pages here. I do all my HTML coding in Notepad now, this way, things will show up more correctly.

A guy in one of these contact communication places called me ignorant, hostile and narrow minded yesterday. He thought I was an open minded, pretty, wild Mallory Knox (you know the serial killer woman in the Natural Born Killers road movie). I really like that movie, it's one of my favorite actually, but underneath my childish aggressions I dont think you would find someone like Mallory Knox. Although I did get myself the exact same clothes worn by the Mallory Knox character in the movie. Although I did wear them for two weeks on a car vacation to Germany with my family a few years ago, I belive there are plenty of girls out there that would play her better than me. I'm just not wild in that violent animalistic way. I'm not wild in that sexual promiscuous way either. People are different and it's okay. I'm the shy sensitive girl and you should be happy when you find aggressions in such people like myself. Life is not just black or white. People are not just pretty or ugly. There are shades and not all aggressions are bad.

Some online guys think that I'm open minded too. They seem to think that open mindedness is all about sex somehow. I'm just not looking for a guy that thinks I'm wild and pretty. I'm looking for someone that could understand me. If that makes me narrow minded, well, then I am.

I like the music by Moloko. I really like the womans voice. When it comes to music I really feel the voice in vocal music is quite important. Another voice I really like is the female voice in Sneaker Pimps, but I dont think she is a part of them anymore. Another really great voice is the male voice in Dir en Grey, it's different, it vibrant, it's passionate and it's beautiful. Go hear to them, listen to the song called "Embryo". Download from WinMX. Experience.

I just read an article about this old tradition in Asian countries. I think it has to do with the Geisha thing. There are these women that put on Asian traditional clothes and get hired by men to spend time with them. No sex though. In the modern world of today, many blond European women have found this money magnet to be an easy way to make a living in Asian countries. Blond women are obviously popular in these places. So I read an article about this. These European Geisha women often turned to drugs because they felt men were boring and shallow. I though; Is it me there's something wrong with, or what? If I demanded money from men just to spend time with me, I think it would be a big possibility that I would meet a lot of shallow men too and probably eventually start to think that most men were boring. I also read about one of these romantic celebrity marriages just now. It claimed that this Jennifer Lopez woman demanded millions from her new husband if he cheated on her and that he would get big money from her if she ever cheated. Just so they could worry about their precious money every time they thought about someone else. Isn't that romantic? I thought Jennifer Lopez just came out with a new song that was about remembering were you came from, not worshipping money or something like that. Fancy talk is just not enough for me.

The Psychedelic Republicans is cool.

Damn the artificial glitter, no one really needs such trash.
Note: I'd love you if you sue me for my opinions on this site.

Dont you think my bad english is cute just like crafty youthful Anarchism? No? Dont you want to feel the air in your hair in a grey monday morning, skipping the adultish boredom with me? No? Dont you want to smile with me trough the sleepless nights? No? Dont you want to travel all around the world in a funky colorful hippie bus, with me, when you think of my bad english? No?... Well, why not?!?

The world is strange and I make no sense today, so I'll end this entry before I turn into insanity.

Old Comments:
These comments are taken from the site, where I used to keep my journal, before I moved it here. You can add replies to the entry, or the comments below.
From Wiley381: I love the entry! I'm a little worried that, for whatever reason, I could follow the free-flow-of-thought and then, at the end, you apologized for it not making sense. I guess that makes me as out-there as you. Anyway, I loved it! Oh yeah - what do you think of the female vocalist for Portishead? and do you like Janis Joplin? Both are rock-goddesses to me... WOW

From blanketman: this is not about sex - this is for everyone. it's late, I'm tired, but I managed to read all your words (did not understand everything, I'm kinda stupid). and yes, I did enjoy your "story". female voices, hm, a big black superunknown field in my cd.collection, thanks for the tips, I'll check out Moloko, hope her voice has more life than the german synth.boys on my current mp3.playlist, thanks again. enough said, I'll come back for more of your readable words when I get the e.mail.notification again, write more, I'll read it, and if my comment is to long, just let me know, ok? oh, almost forgot, I have one track on my playlist with a femal vocal performance (which i absolutely adore): Claire Voyan - "Majesty".

From LucK: I think your diary is cute? Is that what you were aiming for. Prolly not, sorry. And the english is bad of course, but in a good way. Props on the whole distinction between being open minded/wild and being promiscuous or violent. Keep writing, your head is spitting out some wild stuff.

From Raven: Hello Wiley, thanks for your comment! I personally cant always follow my own free-flow-of-thought either, so dont worry ;) I really like the female voice of Portishead yes, they are really great. I also do like Janis Joplin too. The voice, the music, everything.

Hello to you Blanketman and thanks for the comment that is not about sex! It's okay that you dont understand everything I write, because I dont understand everything myself either. I LOVE your long comment, do make them long, or short or whatever you want. I love the feedback. I've never heard Claire Voyan I think, I will check it out. Thanks for the tip.

Hi Luck and thanks for your words! It's okay if people dont think my diary is cute, or if they think it's cute. I write in this online diary because I like it, not because I want people to think it's cute. You are nice though and I'd love to have you back here, if you can deal with my bad english ;) Take care.

From Matt: I think you're talking about the Japanese "hostesses." I saw something about them on the Learning Channel one time. Interesting stuff.

From Raven: Yes, that's what I'm talking about, Japanese "hostesses." I read it was inspired by the Geisha tradition though. Very interesting yes. If I was a man and wanted to hire a women, I would probably want sex too, because I guess it's easier to find a girl that wants to spend time with you, for free, than it is to find one that just wants sex. I mean are there not plenty of girls out there, in any country that a guy can steal some free time with? Those Japanese "hostesses" didn't have sex with these men, so I guess it must be some kind of status for these men to have those women. The whole thing is strange if you ask me.

From blanketman: last time I was here, I forgot a letter, the letter T, in the name Claire Voyant, got it right this time, and the band's url is also here, your majesty. thanks for the tip about Moloko, I downloaded a few tunes. your page is truely a virtual glorybox, so I shall return, as earlier written. and the Geisha thing, do you like apoptygma berzerk? in the apbl2000.dvd, the main main stephan runs around in the Nevada desert, wearing a black suit with a small "starsign" on his chest; stating the words: "male escort service". (just an anecdote)

From Raven: Yeah, I thought Claire Voyan without the T seemed strange, the name I mean. I will download some tunes by them now and see what I think. I have heard too little of Apoptygma Berzerk to say anything about them, maybe I should check them out as well.