Food For The Dying

The other day I studied the Final Meal Requests from the Texas Department of Criminal Justice. You know the last meal the convicted picks before they are executed. I believe I spent over five hours or more at this site. By choice of heart, I've never been a busy person you know. I always have time for the things a lot of people would call useless. Maybe I'm just smarter than most people, not career smart, but just smarter. I like to think so... The Final Meal Request site always makes me hungry...

I like to read the final meal request first, then I click the offender information link and look at the picture of the person. Then I sit there and imagine what kind of person it used to be. Does he look mean?, what kind of family did he come from? If he picked ice cream, do I think he is an ice cream type of person, or did the ice cream person pop up because of a final enlightenment of the last moments in that body? a wish to be a child again? Do a tough criminal guy really like ice cream? Am I too stuck up in character roles? Did he pick cheeseburgers because he never had a caring mom that cooked for him? or is cheeseburgers considered to be a home cooked meal in America? Have I ever tasted onion rings? Do candy represent the inner child, the naive mind that lives too much for the moment, or is it all about perversion? Can I guess the race or cultural background just by looking at the meal request? Does the t-bone steak have anything to do with family grill parties in the backyard? Am I too influenced by American rap music videos and the Spike Lee movie Do The Right Thing? Does the ones that picked a lot of food look greedy and mafia alike? Do those that didn't want a final meal seem innocent, more truthful, less scary? What does banana pudding taste like? Is it yellow? do they come with cream? Is it a grandmother type of pudding or is it a store brand? Do those that picked coffee seem less hostile, more dad alike?

Not all of them are men however, there are a few women, less that five. I remember Karla Faye Tucker, the woman that seemed to have changed so much and truly matured. I sat up that night and looked at the live news from her execution. Many people believed they would not execute her. To me she seemed to be someone I would like to have as a neighbour. She picked Banana, Peach and Garden Salad with Ranch Dressing as her final meal. Somehow that doesn't change my impression of her. If she had picked t-bone steak and ice cream I would probably have to ponder for awhile.

Jesus was also executed in Texas. He raped and killed a girl. He picked t-bone steak, baked potato, salad, vanilla shake and chocolate ice cream as a final meal. Chocolate ice cream is not the ice cream that seem like the most gentle flavour. Strawberry ice cream would seem soft and romantic if it's eaten by a man. Vanilla ice cream makes the eater seem delusional. One guy picked liver, that just seems oldfashioned and brutal to me. Even if I would be a cold tough guy, I think I would cry my heart out, if liver was one of the last things I saw in this life.

Milk gives me a feeling of innocence or craving for the motherly warmth. One guy only picked milk as the final meal and in my opinion that was the second best choice. Not because I like milk, but because milk was the first thing most people taste in life. The greatest last meal request is in my opinion the one by this man right here. He picked Chocolate birthday cake with "2/23/90" written on top, seven pink candles, one coconut, kiwi fruit juice, pineapple juice, one mango, grapes, lettuce, cottage cheese, peaches, one banana, one delicious apple, chef salad without meat and with thousand island dressing, fruit salad, cheese, and tomato slices. I would sure like to see that delicious apple.

Is it just me or is it something wrong with this profile report paper? Look at the Co-Defendants section, it says; -"none". Then look at the Race of Victim(s) section, it says; -"white female (sentenced to death). Race of other three murder victims unknown". I'm thinking, did they sentence the victim to death? or is it just my bad english knowledge hitting the bottom again?

I do not, nor will I ever approve of any death penalty. Just so that is said.

As I said in the last entry, I was going to tell you about some movies I have seen. I will mention one here now and talk about the others later. As you may know I'm a big horror movie fan, eighties horror. You might then think that I'm not a soft soul when it comes to the violent scenes. Horror for me is often more about black humour, than about liking violence. That's also one of the reasons why I dont really like the modern horror so much. It's just not that fancy anymore, most of the time. Movies like Scream lacks both story and fanciness. Of course it's because times change and teenage killers are more real these days. Anyway, I wasn't going to talk about this.

Anyway, talking about people that ended up on death row. I saw the movie called Ted Bundy. I thought it was supposed to be a portrait type of movie, giving you glimse behind the known facts of the most famous serialkiller in the world. The movie was just shit. It started with his college years, around the time he first attacked a woman, raped and killed her. The movie included numerous rape scenes, one woman managed to escape, he was caught because of her, he escaped, raped and killed some more, was caught, had sex with a fan of him in the public jail visitor room, then I believe he escaped once more, raped and killed again, then he cried as the nazi alike jail officers stuffed his behind with something so he wouldn't pee and do everything in his pants when he died. Then there was a question; Who is Ted Bundy? and I thought; that was what I was thinking trough the movie too. The whole thing just made me feel sick to my stomach. I really dont like rape scenes and when that last scene came, with Ted Bundy and those cold jail officers stuffing his behind, I just though; this is just too much for me! We know he was that successful, smart, charismatic, cold serial killer. Couldn't they try to dig a little? I mean who was his parents? Was he ever really a child? Questions you might ask if they dont add any links to a childhood in a portrait. Obviously it was not really a portrait, but just a movie that told you how many women this guy killed and that he cried when he was executed. As the sensetive person that I am I felt sorry for him, I felt sorry for those women and I felt sorry for those awful jail officers.

If I were a convicted criminal what would my last meal choice be, you might ask. Well, I would pick my mom's home cooked Christmas dinner, with all the attachements.

Now I will go eat asparagus soup. I will try to eat it imagining it was my last meal. What would you pick?