Kaleidoscopic Dreams

I thought Obama would win the American election, just as I thought Bush would win, when he won the second time. Difference betwene Bush and Obama to me, is that I disliked Bush before he was elected and I liked Obama before he ran for President. Why is that? you might say, I'm not even an American, but you see I'm like any other European who are interested in the world affairs, I love and hate what USA brings about, it's cultures, it's history, it's entertainment of wonderful Hollywood films, people like Martin Luther King, people like Jimmy Carter, Oprah and the romantic individualism in the political dreams that blooms, from the modern ideas of the people.

I sat and watched the election the night Obama won, because here in Norway because of the time difference, it happened at night. The sentimental rat that I am (which I try to hide, but I have noticed that I have become more and more sentimental with the years. I remember myself as a teen, being someone that rarely cried), I had to let a few tears drop, as I witnessed the very first election of a black President in United States. It touched me with such a joy in that moment! (maybe I'm a bit naive and moonstruck at times), it made me think of the Toni Morrison's stories that I have fell in love with, Oprah's film Beloved and it's message, Rosa Park who sat on a bus and changed the law, a simple individual that made a huge difference. What a terrible and wonderful country that is I thought to myself, this multi cultural USA on the TV screen, that showed people holding hands in unity, the togetherness, as they waited for their new President.

It all represent for me a huge inspiration, even if Obama wont be a fantastic President, I think he will still make a change happen, in little ways and in big ways, a change that USA have needed for such a long time. Racism is a lot more than a few Nazis, that openly calls themselves racists. There are masses of people, that would never call themselves racists, but that still carries an ignorance within them, an ignorance that is just like a racism. An attitude and a fear of crossing the borders, of generations of group mentality and huge class differences. I am very open to believe, that common peoples ignorance and blindness to others, are worse than a Nazis racism. It can be worse, because the world inhabits more blindness, than it owns true racists. I don't think I have met a lot of racists in my life, but I can tell you that I have met a lot of ignorant people, blind to the racism they create. Just think about it yourself, have you ever heard anyone talk bad about a certain group, giving it pretty pointless accusations, for example saying that they smell bad, they are more violent than others, the culture is sick etc. I have heard this and very often I have thought, that it told me more about the person saying these things, than it told me about those they were referring to. This is a form of racism, it's judging people you don't know, judging them in a very shallow way, making yourself look dumb, by only looking at someones exterior. Sadly I think this stupidity of ignorance in some people, paints the environments so, so much, it's sunken into our culture everywhere, in all countries, in all small towns and maybe especially in USA, the lovehate romantic colourful and bright kaleidoscopic land.

The country that my own grandparents parents dreamed about and moved to, because Norway was poor and awful, after the first world war. They didn't want to live in Brooklyn and moved back to Norway after awhile, my grandmother said it had so many blacks moving in there and they created so much crime. That was then, some of my ancestors were ignorant white people, just like so many others were back then, but we have moved forward. I belong to a different generation, as my parents did and I was taught not to judge people, after anything else but their true personal character. Cause why would I be anything better, than someone I didn't even know, I learned this from my upbringing and I suppose from experience and it gave me an openness and a curiosity towards people. I remember myself being a very questioning kid, I was lucky to have been given a reason, an opportunity, to think about what really matters and what things really mean in life. Some parents and some peoples upbringing, steal kids ability to be open and it makes their mindset black and white and boring and mean and cold. I think so. We live in an open world, with so much to give and take. There are those that sit in offices getting paid, to close doors to keep people out, they treat individuals like the papers they fill out, sign and shift around, their work is to put the borders in it's place, to keep the barn animals separated from each other, to ruin peoples hopes and dreams.

As a kid I thought adulthood would be fun and easy, but I noticed in my early teens, that it was far from the truth. I do know what it feels to be singled out and I say that, without any pride or strength, I have always felt more ashamed of my own problems, than I craved pity. I tried to hide it. I wont talk about it now, but I used to sit in a wheelchair and it made me very dysfunctional at school, this was because most of the schools only had stairs. I feel very bitter to this day when I look back at myself as a young teen, always feeling I had to apologise for my disability, my inability to function like the others, yet it was something that was out of my control. I have always identified myself with outsiders, I did even when I was just a little kidergarden kid, part of me was different I felt, in the heart. Maybe I chose to be everything I am, maybe I chose it before I was born, maybe I was meant to get sick, in order for me to learn something and to give something, something I wouldn't so easily be able to give otherwise. Naturally people with problems tend to find a meaning, in the difficult moments, they seek it out and maybe just invent it in their mind; -"I always felt different as a kid, it was there in my heart". Maybe it was a role I had to make myself fit for.

I hated kindergarten and school, it was dull, it was terrible, it had too many kids, too much noises, too much nonsense. When I quit kindergarten, I heard one of the kindergarten aunts tell my mother, that I was a difficult child. This aunt was a real bitch, I felt she hated me because I hated the place she worked at, hated the environment she created. She was the type that love to use the little authority she owned, to play boss and be wicked. All jobs small and big has their own tiny or giant bosses, either they push kids around just because they are adults, or they shove peoples self confidence down, just because they work in some fancy office, or they neglect the country, just because they can do that, as a politician...

Yes I was never a lover of school, or it's grey system. But I loved preschool, loved, LOVED IT, it was the best time of my childhood. The aunts were kind and motherly, goodhearted and sweet and I never wanted to quit going there. Hell if I could go to preschool till I tropped dead, I imagine I would be truly happy for the rest of my life! We made crafts, we drew pictures, finger painted, there were book readings and games and toys and not too many kids, it was a friendly, calm and healthy enviroment for little beings. I was very shy and sensetive of places and people as a kid, I easily liked and disliked. I remember we made a Christmas tree decoration in preschool, it was a pine cone on a string, with silver or gold glitter spray. I sat at the very top end of a long table, having all the other kids on left and right of me, I have always like to sit at the end, you know to get a full view of everyone and everything. The aunt at the table showed us an example of a finished pine cone she had sprayed, she showed us how the silver sprayings, looked like frozen glittery snow petals. One by one the kids went out into another room to get their own pine cone sprayed, we were all excited to see what everyone picked, silver or gold. I was the last one to go out and get my pine cone turned sparkly disco cool, when I saw that silver was what they all decided on, I knew what I was going to pick. I left that day holding my own gold sprayed pine cone, high up against the snowy sky in December, when my mum came to pick me up. I felt my pine cone was unique, because I thought there had to be something extra special and magical about the gold that nobody wanted...

I hope Obama will do great things for America, for the world, for the dream that gives everyone that see the wrong things in humanity, a hope that we can start to blend more in good ways and do things together, in a different and more modern place. Stop blaming each others so and start noticing, that we all play a part in our evolution. I might not agree with everything he stands for, but I was very touched, when I heard the speech he held after he was elected, where he mentions different minority groups, it was a truly good moment I think.

One cause for me, that made me dislike the American politics as a young teen, is the death penalty. I know that Obama supports it as lots of Americans do, but at least I heard him say, that he wanted to do something about the cases, where innocent people might have been found guilty. I saw an execution on TV when I was about thirteen, I have seen several more after the first one, electrocutions, hangings, beheadings and stonings. Now today they don't electrocute or gas people too much anymore in USA, they use an humane method instead by anesthesia. It's still murder, caused by a hate for the criminal, a criminal who are not dangerous to the public inside a prison, a criminal who are not supposed to become a victim inside the justice system, but are really meant to take responsibility over it's own crime. One thing is to send military into foreign countries, killing civilians, another thing is to purposely and with a massive hatred, kill individuals inside brick walled prisons, for the purpose of satisfying a goverment's sense of authority and peoples feeling of revenge. Cavemens morale in life. Both examples are just as awful a picture, of a country with an attack military and capital punishment. A country obsessed with violent solutions to it's problems. One thing are serialkillers that we don't know how to understand or change, another thing is a young youth who commits a terrible murder, but changes trough the years and end up as a different person. By learning the reasons behind it's immature crime, by getting to know themselves trough the change and become someone, that looks back at the youth it once was, with a care for it, like a parent, maybe that one raised itself, from the gutter. I don't know, but consider it. Death penalty is wrong in every way, but life imprisonment is also wrong, in those cases where criminals have a good chance, of recovering from their past.

I wouldn't have had anything against, having Karla Fay Tucker as my neighbour after her change. Criminals like herself would have been released, after a served sentence in my country, as in most European countries. In USA they executed her, without solid reason, the reason being hate and anger, a resentment against someone, who clearly had taken responsibility over it's crime. I sat up that night when they executed her, looking at the news and hoping it wouldn't happen. There are other criminals that don't seem to change, but in a different prison system, they just might, without a doubt they would all have a better opportunity, had the system worked better. And that is fair, because our science have taught us, that everyone could become a criminal, if they were given a specific upbringing, a negative environment where crime easily blooms. Being against the death penalty, is not about forgetting the victims on all sides. It's about knowing that killing the criminal, only creates another murderer and it leaves the society guilty, of not taking responsibility over it's own negativity.

Denmark are known to have one of the most functioning, prison systems in the world (there is a good documentary on this, but I can't remember the name of it). That small little tiny "unsignificant" country, that USA have a lot to learn from about crime prevention. One thing that would benefit the powerful nation that USA represent, is really to open up more and take lesson from others, lose some of the puffy pride and be a little more humble, a little more open. Imagine all the wealth, these moneypower loving people inside systems, could have saved, if they became a little more tolerant towards other country's ideas. The Danish prison system is an an expensive one, a humane system that focus on growth, anger management, self awareness and personal education among other things. Daily the inmates are confronted with their problems, the things that made them end up in prison. Rapists learn to communicate with rape victims, murderers have to meet and confront murder victims, for example families and those who were affected by the crime (not necessarily those that were directly involved in the case). This prison system gives good results, showing that in a liberal prison, where criminals were challenged to improve themselves, more of them left the prison after served sentence and never returned. Because of the good experiences with this system, they decided to try it out in Florida USA I think it was, on youth criminals and it proved to be working there aswell. A larger potion of inmates were rehabilitated in this type of prison. And isn't that a great thing, for a country with a high crime rate. Naturally this prison costs a lot, but when you hear how much USA spends on warfare, it's sad to think about just how good, it could be for the people, if the leading folks saw the value, in building a better and fair prison system. A system where less people got life sentences and more inmates could leave as healthy citizens and not return as criminals.

I said there is a few things, that I think Obama should do something about, as fast as he can. One them is to close Guantánamo, a completely illegal prison system, he said he would close it, lets see. Another one is the death penalty, knowing that he is in support of it, one can only hope, he will do something about the cases, where there might be innocent serving life or deathrow. A good idea would be to look at a man called Juan Melendez, read about his life story, meet him and think about the cruel America, the unfair USA that leave a bad feeling in the stomach, imagining this person's life. Obama should meet with people like him, any honest good politician in USA should and let it inspire them, to change the law. This cause has everything to do with the group barriers, that I'm stressing so much. It has everything to do with the huge class differences in USA, the poverty that the groups create, by being so divided and caring so little about sharing. Yes sharing you know, I know it's a difficult word and a difficult act, to those that think everyone's life is it's own responsibility. It's simply not true, because we live together, we share, we take and there is never anything wrong, with being more sharing, more caring. Especially in cases where it's needed. Even if you were wrong in the end, you would still be right, right about fighting for true justice. Take a look at cases like the West Memphis Three and Troy Davis, just two of many cases. Here we are talking about people having been found guilty, without evidence to prove they did it. They had a poor defence, simply because they were poor, talk about the land of the free.

In USA you have to be rich to hire a proper lawyer, if you are poor it means you have a much higher risk, of being found guilty of serious crimes you didn't commit. There are numerous cases that proves this, you can read about them and see documentaries about them. People have even been executed and later found to be innocent! They serve life without parole and capital punishment, in cases where little to no evidence, against the accused is present. We have heard of people buying themselves out of criminal charges. It can't hardly be called justice. This is just a small example, of how flawed and criminal the American justice system really is. You can look up more facts, of it's nastiness for yourself.

The thing is that maybe, the American justice system reflects the fear, of the high crime rate the American society carries. The gun culture, the cowboy and western romanticism of putting the bad and the good, in it's separate barn stables. I don't really know, I've never even been to USA (although I would love to), I got all my impression of USA from TV, news, web and people that have lived there. The American Cops show is very shocking. I felt sad every time I've seen it, now I refuse to look at it. The violence that the cops display and the immense cowardice, when they shoot and kill sick individuals that carry knives, situations it seems professionals should be able to handle, without killing anyone. The mentality seem to be shoot first and ask afterwards. In one of the stories there, there was a man walking with a knife on the highway and about seven cops with guns walking close behind him, it seems they could easily, shoot the guy in the legs. They ended up shooting him close range, not even being sure if he had been shoot, not until they turned him over on the ground and discovered, that it was not in the legs he was wounded. Some of the cops had a language that made you think, they still went to junior high, or themselves belonged to a criminal gang. Maybe the Cops show are a perfect example, of how much United States are damaged by weapons and authority arrogance (?). It's a terrible real life program, that shows a disregard and disrespect, a real blindness for the little man. They had a crying drug addicted woman on this show, interrogated as if it wasn't a sick person, police officers shooting small dogs, a mentally ill man shot down by the cops, dying on the ground and a female officer standing by, saying none was injured into a police phone. Most of the cops on the show seem to have little, to no empathy or concern for their "victims" and they display this, in what appears to be, a totally unashamed cold attitude. They bash into poor peoples homes with guns and bats, strange toothless peoples homes, screaming and yelling, dirty little pets running around, little kids crying here and there and very often at the end of the story, you have no solid idea, as to why the cops were there, in the first place. Often it seems it's some small drug pot plant in the window they are after. Often you are left with a feeling that tells you, the cops did more damage showing up at that house, than they did anything good. This show is so peculiar, it makes me wonder if the film makers purposely, are trying to make the cops look bad, or if indeed the police commonly are awful in USA. Why arrest drug addicts? Why not use more pepper spray instead of guns? Why push homeless people around? Why handcuff a dying man? I have no respect for the police on Cops. We had a similar program about the police, here in Norway and it was very different from the Cops show, the police actually seemed to be doing a a good job there. I don't doubt at all, the there are good American police officers, or really bad ones in Norway, but the Cops show doesn't put a lot of the good ones for display, nor does it give a good impression of the police force.

Seriously they should do something, about the class differences in USA. If Obama feels he is as black as he looks like, he should put this at the top on his agenda. Barn animals are outdated now, we want eggs from free roaming chickens these days and the human rights says, that people in groups should fight, for the other groups rights, in order to respect themselves. It makes societies into communities. People shouldn't live like barn animals anymore, separated from each other, the colourful mix in USA is what represent a dream, for so many around the globe. I think the American society is our future, I live in an Americanized country. I also think the American society is a past, that should open up to modern ways of smaller countries. It will happen, they just now elected their very first black President. Symbolically it means so much, because some of the American past belongs to the black slaves, that were taken from Africa. Go way back to the natives of USA, the history of the Indians there and look at America today. The problems that lies in poverty and class differences, clearly has a feeling of racism to it, even in those cases, where it doesn't have anything to do with race. I was easily touched, when I saw how moved people were on TV, when Obama was elected. I felt happy and proud for USA, even though I have never been to this country. I hope and wish, that really good things will come out of this, for USA and for the world.